The Tortilla

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, a flour tortilla with butter is probably the best snack ever. I have held this opinion for as long as I can remember. Sure I’ve had grilled cheese sandwiches and milk and cookies, I’ve indulged in cheese and crackers or apple slices, but for me nothing tops a flour tortilla with butter. It’s simple and delicious and amazing. All it takes is a few moments on the burner until you get just the right amount of crispy, flakey, texture- you can use a microwave in a pinch but it isn’t as good, smear some butter across that round, heavenly circle of flatbread that I can only liken to the manna of the Old Testament, roll it up and be sure to fold up the bottom end so the butter doesn’t drip on to the floor. There it is. A few moments of sublime satisfaction.

Tortillas and Mexican food are inextricable. Like rice with Japanese food, bread with American cuisine, and debt with President Obama, some things are always going to go hand in hand. These delectable disks of delicious dough derived from the kitchens of heaven have a long and stories history which can be found at the Mission Tortilla Factory at Disney’s California Adventure (sponsored by Mission Foods!) but if you haven’t got an extra hundred bucks for Disneyland and you don’t live in California you can get all of this rich and wonderful history for free here at ImSupposedToBeMexican.com because I love you so much. Tell your friends!

Growing up I always had flower tortillas more often than corn tortillas. Corn tortillas were around and they seemed to be preferred by my grandfather. The more durable texture of the corn tortilla seems to be more suitable for scooping up pinto beans and smearing with sour cream or guacamole whereas flour tortillas are better for wrapping up larger quantities of food as in a burrito or enchiladas. Of course these are anything but hard and fast rules. Though I have a penchant for the flour variety I prefer corn tortillas for tacos, the tortilla lightly toasted with a touch of oil or even fried up in to a crispy shell (I do not, however, like those store bought taco shells that seem to be made to arrive at the store already stale). There are other members of the tortilla family which include gorditas, tostadas, and the gordita’s Salvadorian cousin, the pupusa. I mentioned earlier about heating up a tortilla on the range or, if all else fails, in the microwave. But the best way is by using what you will find in most any Mexican household: the comal. The comal is a flat, cast iron piece of cookware sort of like a skillet that is often handed down from generation to generation. It has to be oiled just so, it never leaves it’s spot on the stovetop, and only gets better and cooks more evenly as time goes on. When my parents got the chance to redo their kitchen they specifically sought a stovetop with a fifth burner where the comal would have a permanent home. FYI, though I am a fan of Chipotle and find their chicken burritos as one of the best anglicized examples of how to bring Mexican food to the palates of Des Moines and Wichita, that device they use to heat up their tortillas is sadly inadequate.

So where in when did people’s love affair with the tortilla begin? For the answer to that question we take a look back through the annals of history long before El Pollo Loco was founded in 1975, or even Taco Bell in ’62. No for the whole story we need go back a little further. According to an a passage in Wikipedia which lacks any form of citation the tortilla dates back at least 10,000 years along with a Mayan legend about a peasant making the first tortilla from ground corn for his hungry king. Given their history of farming corn of course it would be the Mayans or the Aztecs who came up with a million different ways to eat corn including using ground corn to make cornmeal and then said cornmeal into cakes and breads which would eventually find their form as a tortilla. This is not far off from the discovery of other tasty treats like popcorn. Anyway, the great and ancient civilizations who pioneered the foundations of our modern systems of mathematics, astronomy, and art, also loved their vittles which is why so many wonderful foods come from the region. Many of these foods were discovered by the conquistador Cortes who brought them back to Spain. These little flatbreads/cakes, called tlaxcalli by the natives, were given the name “tortillas” by the Spanish, their word for “little cakes.” Weird side note: the Spanish have also given the name tortilla to a potato omelet.

With that long and storied history of the corn tortilla I kept searching for some solid data about the origin of the flour tortilla but kept coming up empty handed. While the ancient civilizations of Mexico and Central America were no strangers to wheat flour, corn was the food staple upon which their lives were based. It makes sense now when I find that flour tortillas are more popular in the northern states of Mexico than they are in the southern states. With all of those wheat fields here in the America it’s logical to assume that as the old empires made their way north some suitable substitutions had to be made when it came to dietary preferences. My mother coming from a region just north of central Mexico told me that as a girl corn tortillas were more popular and easy to come by than their flour counterparts. My dad on the other hand, coming from the northern states bordering America, always had flour tortillas around.

As for state of tortillas today, they’re everywhere. In my lifetime alone they’ve gone from being found in the Ethnic Foods aisle to being found in 7-11. They’ve gone mainstream. Head to old town San Diego or Olvera street in Los Angeles and you will still hear the clapping hands of ladies in the kitchen forming round balls of masa into torillas. By the way, if an elderly woman sarcastically asks you if you are making tortillas it’s probably because you are chewing loudly.

So there is your history of the tortilla. Unlike the Disney attraction I can't give you a free tortilla now that we’re through- quick tip, if you’re visiting the theme park on a budget there is no limit to how many times you can go through the little attraction and there usually is no wait time either. Walk through a few times and you’ve got enough tortillas to keep you satisfied and happy for an afternoon!

Some of the other tortilla related foods I mentioned earlier are gorditas, which are smaller, fatter tortillas that can be stuffed or used as a foundation to pile on meat and beans and cheese and stuff. Tostadas are crispy, fried tortillas often used to pile on other food as well. Think of them as tortilla chips that haven’t been cut apart yet. By the way, anyone in my family will tell you my dad invented colored tortilla chips back in the early 80s. True story. But it will have to wait for another time. Until then, my supposed Mexicans, I am heading to my stovetop to make one of the greatest snacks of all time. Adios!

The Crying Woman

As you stroll along the lakeside you listen to the gentle lapping of the water on the shore. The moon glows in a blood-orange hue just above the horizon as dusk falls over you. In the distance fireflies bounce and bob over the tall grasses that peek out along the waterfront. The ground is moist beneath your feet and the soil softens beneath your every step as you walk along, admiring the moon’s reflection over the lake, the chirping of the crickets, and the occasional call of an owl. But then something seems off. You suddenly feel warm over one side of your neck and you look over your shoulder; it’s the unmistakable sensation of the invisible pressure of someone else’s gaze falling upon you. You know you’re being watched. The speed of your steps increases. More than just speeding up, a draft washes over you, blowing against you, trying to push you back but you press on. You’re almost running now and it’s at this point that you realize you only hear the crunch of the grass and soil beneath your feet. No more chirping crickets. No more hooting owls. The water is completely still as you come to a standstill. Where did the fireflies go? All you hear is your own breathing coming in shaking, stammering, gulps. Then you hear something else. It could be your mind playing tricks on you but you hold your breath to make sure. It starts off like a moaning but that’s only because it sounds muffled, off in the distance. You want to run but you don’t know where the sound is coming from and it’s impossible to tell if you’d be running towards it or away from it. The moaning gets louder but it isn’t just moaning. The pain is the same but it is something more. Wailing. Weeping. As though the world around you is crying for something that’s happened. Or. Something that’s about to happen. Something that cannot be stopped or prevented. It’s the crying of a woman who has lost everything. Soon the crying is everywhere- it’s upon you. And it’s the last thing you hear…

La Llorona is a cautionary tale told throughout Latin America. Think of it as the Sleepy Hollow story of the Spanish speaking world.

There are many different versions of the story but the bare bones of it is this: There was a woman who killed her own children to be with the man she desired. She was subsequently spurned by her lover and as a result she killed herself. However, because of her atrocities she is forced to wander (usually near a body of water), weeping for what she had done, weeping for her lost children and looking to replace them. She is looking for her children and will often take children who misbehave or wander off.

Needless to say it has scared the hell out of many, many children.

It is difficult to say exactly where this story originated as there are examples of similar tales all over the world. Among the ancient Greek gods, the big guy, Zeus, had an affair with Lamia. When Hera, Zeus’ wife, learned of the affair she forced him to give up his relationship to Lamia who was then forced to eat her own children. Out of jealousy, Lamia preys on human children and eats any that she catches. The Greeks have some pretty messed up stories. Other variations of La Llorona’s story say that those who hear her weeping are marked for death, not unlike those who hear the wailing of the Gaelic Banshee. Other possible origins of the story point to the Spanish invasion of the Aztec empire. Some say the goddess Cihuacoatl is weeping for the fall of her people. Others point to La Malinche, a native woman who served as an interpreter for Cortes and turned her back on Mexico. Though there is no hard evidence to support it, some say she bore the conquistador a child and was later abandonded.

An interesting website that provides more detailed aspects of the current legend of La Llorona can be found at www.lallorona.com/la_index.html. It tells different stories of La Llorona as a witch, a harlot, a siren, and a virgin. They get a little creepy so don’t read them late at night by yourself.

As for why the story exists, like most stories it is probably a cautionary tale. On one level it is meant to keep children from wandering off. Like the boogey man or Michael Jackson, these characters are meant to frighten children and keep them away from strangers. It is also a warning for young women to either avoid being enticed by the wrong man, or to remember the sacred duties of a mother. Pre-Columbian women had a lot more power and influence than their conquered descendants. The European conquerors did not have the same idea of the sacred feminine that the indigenous peoples of the Americas had and as such did many things to destroy their ideas of the role women should have in society. That’s just the way it went and the story of La Llorona, a woman who is forced to an eternity of misery because of her failure as a wife and mother, may have been a part of that.

Whatever the origin of the story, it is a scary one. It’s certainly enough incentive to keep it in your pants a little while longer. Because if you’re getting down to it and the woman starts weeping… well, I can’t imagine any good will come of that.

Futbol (Not Football)

In nearly every country in the world the most popular sport with the greatest and most popular star athletes is soccer. Every country, that is, except for these here United States. For whatever reason it has never taken on the same fervor here that is so prevalent across the globe. I don’t know what the exact reason is for this. I was never that in to soccer coming up because no one was really all that in to soccer. Sure I played on teams as a child but professional soccer matches were not televised nor did they get any mention during the sports segment of the news. Time I’ve spent abroad has at times coincided with some pretty big tournaments like the World Cup and the Euro Cup and sitting in the pubs and cafes watching these games was as exciting and enthralling as any Super Bowl or Championship series I’ve seen here in America. It is certainly a hell of a lot more engaging than watching baseball or golf on TV. For the life of me I do not understand why soccer has failed to take hold in America but I have a few theories. It could be that because soccer matches only have one break with no “time-outs” it does present a challenge for selling advertising spots. Halftime is the only opportunity to run commercials and although this is a much more cynical explanation it is a possibility. Another reason might simply be the American mode of thinking. In country founded by people looking to separate from European models and built by those looking for the next big thing, the newest frontier, the greatest opportunity matched only by the risk… Well, I guess what I’m getting at is that American audiences are rarely satisfied with a tie score and have little patience for low scoring games. At least hockey games come with fights.

You say football anywhere besides here and people think soccer. I’m not even sure how we got the name soccer though I understand the word originated in England to distinguish the sport from American football which was gaining popularity here. Even in Mexico where it might make more sense to call it pelota de pye, they call it futbol.

The game we know as soccer does come from Europe though there have been sports associated with kicking or carrying a ball in the Americas going back to the Aztecs. They did have courts or fields with circular goals at either end but it would be presumptuous to say this game influenced soccer because the sport as we know it is generally thought to have been brought over from Europe. The first recorded organized games with an agreed upon set of rules comes from England. It is widely believed that soccer was brought to Mexico by Cornish miners in the late 19th century. It was not much later that a league came about.

Futbol became a professional sport in 1943 and its most successful team with has been Guadalajara with 11 championship titles. Before that there had been professional teams but the league that is in place now has began in 1943. Internationally Mexico has hosted the World Cup twice but has never won but they do have a very respectable team.

Here in the United States soccer has been around for just as long but did not really start gaining popularity until we hosted the 1994 World Cup. The US soccer team did surprisingly well, advancing to the quarter finals but losing to Germany who would eventually take second place. A couple of years later Major League Soccer got its start and many of the members of the US national team took spots in the ten inaugural teams. The US Women’s soccer team has been a powerhouse in recent years and has garnered much international recognition by winning two Women’s World Cup championships in the past ten years. Popularity of the new league went up and down with the national team’s success (or lack thereof at various times) but overall has gone way up from where it was. In California in particular a couple of recent events have greatly increased the exposure of the sport. There was the addition of the expansion team Chivas USA (the Chivas is a very popular team in Mexico), and the recruitment of international star David Beckham. Some would argue that bringing Beckham on board is sort of like the equivalent of taking Brett Favre over to play in Europe’s NFL- he’s kind of past his prime but still has some skill and definitely will draw a crowd. Even still, despite its recent rise in attendance and viewership, the American soccer program is still in its infancy compared to the rest of the world.

This year’s World Cup is going to be held in South Africa while the usual suspects like Brazil and Portugal are expected to do well there are still high hopes for the teams here in North America. Mexico and America are the second highest ranked teams in their respective groups but neither team is favored to win it all by any means. Still, it should be fun to watch.

On a personal note, every Mexican kid has played soccer growing up. I may have gone to school in Orange County but I knew the basics of soccer far before I understood football or basketball. This could also be due to my near complete lack of physical prowess but to my credit I did score the winning goal of the only game my junior high school team won. It wasn’t the highlight of my entire athletic career but it’s up there.

Mexican Cuisine

Describing Mexican cuisine, like describing the cuisine of any country, is no simple task. The varied geography and influences from all over the world have influenced the flavors of Mexican food giving it a panoply of dishes to suit even the most discriminating of tastes. There are a few staples that everyone associates with Mexican food and these are things like beans, rice, corn, and tortillas. Mexican dishes without tortillas is like Japanese food without rice- it’s going to be there no matter what. You may not automatically think “corn” when it comes to Mexican food, but those sneaky Mexicans, they slip it in there without you even noticing. Corn is there in the tortillas, in the masa (the dough) used to make tamales and gorditas, and plenty of other places you might not think to look. It may be inside of you right now! And of course, Mexican food does not have a reputation for being bland which is why various chili peppers, herbs, and spices play a major role on the preparation.

When the Spanish arrived they found that the Aztecs were eating foods made from corn and often complimented with chilies and herbs and eaten along with beans and tomatoes or nopales which are a prickly pear- a type of cactus looking plant. Though it may not have had a Pace Picante label on it, the Aztecs also had salsa by this time. Other foods they ate, foods which are still associated with exotic or tropical climates even though they are widely available around the world, include chocolate and vanilla, avocado, guava, papaya, squash, sweet potato, tomatillos, and some other not so exotic foods like turkey and, having large coastal regions, fish and other seafood. The invading Spanish introduced a variety of animals like cattle, sheep, chicken, goats and pigs. They also brought rice, barley, olive oil, almonds, wine, parsley and spices that were not native to the land. Call it bioterrorism if you like, but I think it makes for some tasty eating. The conquistadors brought Spanish cuisine with them and perhaps it added a new layer of skill to the preparation and perception of Pre-Columbian food, but I really believe the Spanish got the better end of the deal. For those of you who have not been to Spain, I can tell you that it certainly lacks the flavor and creativity of Mexican food.

As stated above, Mexico has a very diverse geography and as such the six regions of Mexico vary greatly in what you can expect from their food. Of course either coast is going to have plenty of seafood. I personally associate the northwest coast with lobster because my family has been visiting Puerto Nuevo in Rosarito since well before I was born. Visiting Cancun I remember seeing plenty of shrimp on the menu.

My father, being from Sonora in the north, remembers having flour tortillas at the table while my mother, hailing from an area closer to Mexico City, rarely had flour tortillas and saw them as a treat and a break from the usual corn tortillas. Regions in the north are going to have dishes with more meat in them as these areas produce a great deal of beef, ostrich, and goat. As you head further south you may find more sauces and sweeter mole on your chicken. Mole is a sauce that is not terribly unlike a savory chocolate sauce; so if you like chicken and you like chocolate then you are in luck. As you head south the cuisine might be more sweet than spicy as they can take advantage of the widely grown produce. Head to Jalisco, the mountainous region in the west, and get ready to have amazing birria, a dish of goat in a spicy, tomato-based sauce. The southeast will get you more chicken dishes that are a bit spicier and that is due to the Caribbean influence. Dish of spicy chicken and rice with perhaps a touch of cocoanut from this area would not be unlike a dish you could find in Haiti. In the Yucatan they have been bee-keeping for thousands of years and so honey makes its way into the food. Find your way into some of the pueblos or villages and that’s where you find cuisine that truly has its roots in the idea of making do with what you’ve got. This is where you can get some of the flavors that you are not going to find at El Torrito like rattlesnake, spider monkey, iguana, grasshoppers and other insects. I haven’t had anything that exotic but I’m rarely disappointed with the taste of any animals I’ve eaten. I’ve got two personal philosophies when it comes to food: 1) If God didn’t want us to eat animals He wouldn’t have made them all out of meat. And 2) If it walks on God’s green earth then I’ll probably eat it someday.

Lastly we get to Central Mexico. This region’s cuisine is heavily influenced by all of Mexico and that makes sense as it has been the cultural and political center of Central America for millennia. They get a little bit of everything but they also have a few dishes that are credited to the region like carnitas, pozole, and menudo( the food, not the boy band), which any Mexican will tell you is THE cure for a hangover.

It’s important to recognize how many different influences have come into Mexican cooking. Aside from the Spanish, other would-be conquerors and immigrants include the French, Irish, Germans, and Portuguese. Each of those nations was once in whole or in part dominated by the Romans who trace their roots to the Macedons or were conquered by the Moors… It’s all in there. We wouldn’t have chorizo without sausage and it didn’t look like the Aztecs were making sausages before the Europeans made their way over. Likewise it’s great to see how much influence Mexican cuisine has exerted across the globe. Ever had salmon with a mango salsa? Or a steak with chipotle? Hell, ever had chocolate anything?

You’ll notice I did not say anything about burritos, or nachos. The reason for this is because that’s not exactly Mexican food. I’ll get to the difference between Mexican food and Tex-Mex soon enough but you should be able to make the distinction between the two by the time I’m done with you. In the mean time, go out and find yourself some real Mexican food if you can. Don’t be afraid of the spicy! Salsa should not taste like ketchup with onions in it, it should give your tongue a tingle. Also, someone please correct me if I’m wrong but I never hear of Mexicans who get heartburn yet I hear of people getting heartburn whenever they eat something spicy. This requires more research.

Quinceañera

My first experience with a quinceañera celebration started with car trouble. I was driving along one day when I realized I had a flat tire. It was an older car and the tire iron that came with the jack was completely useless. It didn’t fit the bolts and because of that I couldn’t get the tire off. I was going to need some help. It was later in the afternoon but not so late that my parents would be home from work so I called a friend of mine to come and help me out. He showed up within a half hour but rather than help me change the wheel he exclaimed, “Hey, get in the car and we’ll be back in a little while. I have to do something at home!” So we ride on back to his house which was just a mile away and I come to see that several of his cousins gathered around the backyard and rehearsing a dance and a waltz. I didn’t know what it was all about so I just sat around and had a Tecate with salt and lime. They went on rehearsing the steps but it was off balance and the coordinator was getting more agitated as the night progressed. Apparently one of the cousins hadn’t shown up and there was a spot that needed to be filled.

And there I was. Sipping on my Tecate.

None of my younger female cousins had yet reached the age of 15 so this was all new to me. I was reluctant at first but the coordinator was really pretty so I relented. The quinceañera was in just four days and we had tonight and the next night to make sure we had all of the steps down. I should also mention that my hesitation to dance in front of a people was due to the fact that I dance about as well as I sing… which is about as well as I play hockey and let me ask you this: Have you ever seen a Mexican play hockey? I didn’t think so. But in the end everything went off without a hitch and I got my introduction to being part of a quinceañera celebration. This was quite a few years ago and all I really remember from the party was that we went to church beforehand, the quinceañera wore a beautiful white dress, I wore a tuxedo, and there was a whole lot of food and tequila. Needless to say I was missing out on a few things.

I performed in a waltz for the celebration of my friend’s sister’s fifteenth birthday. She has a court, not unlike a homecoming queen, that is there to celebrate wtih her. This celebration has roots that go back over 2000 years. It is an amalgam of empires from the Aztecs to the Spanish and the French. Most cultures have some sort of coming-of-age celebration. In America we have sweet sixteen celebrations where young ladies get to be the center of attention. Though most popular in the south, we also have cotillion where debutants join society not as a girl but as a young lady. There are also Bar and Bat-mitzvah celebrations. These types of occasions are found all over the world. The one most familiar to Latin America began with the Aztecs and their celebration of a young girl becoming a woman. And by becoming a woman they meant that she was ready to start making babies. Once the Spanish got involved they replaced the temples with Catholic churches and made this celebration into a very important crossroads for the young lady- she could choose to be a normal woman and raise a family or she could choose a monastic style of life and become a nun.

The distinction of having the celebration at the age of 15 comes from the French in the late 19th century during an era called Porfiriato, which is their equivalent to the Victorian age in English speaking countries. It is named for Mexican President Porfirio Diaz who had a great admiration of French culture and thus brought over a style of European music called Vals (waltz) and the term Chambelan. Like Cinco de Mayo, the quince años celebration is becoming more popular here in the United States than it is in Latin America. Like any great celebration in Mexico, like baptisms, weddings, etc, these parties are often reflective of the family socio-economic status. Here in the states they are great way for Americanized immigrants to maintain a connection to their Mexican heritage (much like referring everyone you know to this website).

A Quinceañera usually consists of some specific traits. Because the Spanish tied the occasion to the church it is customary that before the party there will be a church service where the young lady reaffirms her faith. It is customary for her to receive gifts reflective of the religious aspect like a cross, a rosary, or a Bible. Also, because of the religious aspect, the quinceañera celebration is a big deal for the godparents. Their duty is to the spiritual development and upbringing of the child and the quinceañera celebration is where the child becomes a woman and so celebrates the culmination of the godparent’s duties. During the event the Quinceañera, which is actually the title of the young lady celebrating her coming-of-age, will wear a white dress which is something like a wedding dress. Other traditions vary but often represent her father releasing her into the word as a woman. Sometimes she will wear simple flats which her father will replace with heels. She may carry a doll dress just like her which her father will replace with heels. Or there could be the father/daughter dance where midway he will pass her on to her escort, the Chambelan, while they dance a vals (waltz).

And then, of course, this is followed by food and drink and shots and a big bowl of menudo the next morning.

For those of you wondering what became of my car, my buddy and I returned and were unable to get the wheel off. I came the next day with my dad and a different tire iron and we changed it without incident.

Tequila

First and foremost there are 3 things I want you all to know about tequila:

1) Cuervo Gold is not a premium tequila.
2) Tequila is not meant to be taken as a shot every time you drink it.
3) Your buddies from San Diego State who “totally drank the worm from the bottle of tequila,” they’re lying to you.

Let’s take that last part first. It is a fairly common misconception that one can find a worm in a bottle of tequila but I’m afraid unless it crawled in after you opened the bottle it’s not likely to happen. What you’re probably drinking is mescal, another type of Mexican liquor that like tequila is made from the agave plant. As mescal is bottled a cured worm, usually the larva of an agave snout weevil or the caterpillar of a certain type of moth that is found near agave plants, is added for flavor and aesthetic. For tequila it’s actually illegal to add a worm.

Now, getting back to those first two points- Cuervo Gold is an absolutely horrible tasting swill that I would never recommend to anyone. It is quite possibly the most vile thing I have ever put in my mouth and I have some really messed up friends with whom I’ve gotten pretty drunk. To those who make the point that Cuervo Gold is the most popular tequila in the world, that fact simply makes it the McDonalds of tequila. At best it should be used in margaritas in order to mask the taste and odor. It is this type of hangover in a bottle that is responsible for that face young college students make and why they so desperately need that accompanying salt and lime. Good tequila should not taste like flaming sewage, it should be smooth with a distinct flavor.

Before we get in to what makes a good tequila good, let’s learn a little bit about where it comes from. Tequila by definition comes from the area surrounding the city of Tequila located northwest of Guadalajara. It is only produced in the state of Jalisco and a few limited regions in other states. Tequila is made from the blue agave plant and it should be 100% blue agave. Some lesser tequilas are only around 51% agave which means the rest is sugars and syrup and other wretch inducing additives. According to the always reliable Wikipedia, Aztecs had been making a fermented drink from the plant well before the Spanish arrived. Once the Spanish ran out of their classy European booze they started going native with their alcohol consumption.

Around ten years ago it was difficult to find a decent tequila in America. It was relegated to Mexican restaurants and cheap cantinas outside of Vegas. As the liquor started to gain some prominence and popularity larger corporations started to take notice and wanted to get in on the action and tequila was no longer just a game for small, family-owned distilleries. The money those corporations have spent on marketing and advertising now make it possible for you and I to go to the bar and order a shot of ultra-premium tequila at $20. God bless progress!

Here’s a really easy breakdown of the different types of tequila a brand will offer: Silver is bottled soon after it’s distilled, spending at most a couple of months in steel barrels. Gold is what you get when you blend silver with a reposado or añejo. Reposado is aged for at least two months but less than a year in oak barrels. And añejo is aged at least one year but less than three in oak barrels. A few years ago distillers started offering extra añejo which is aged at least three years. Here’s what all that means- the silver tastes most like the fermented agave, some might say the pure taste of tequila. As it ages in the barrels the tequila takes on the taste of the barrel and the alcohol matures in a way that makes the alcohol richer and more complex. It’s not uncommon for these barrels to have been used in the production of whiskey or bourbon. As for color, the silver is obviously clear and the others can come in various shades of amber.

A delicious tequila does not have to be swallowed from a shot glass. Something like Casa Noble should be sipped from a tumbler or even on the rocks. In Mexico it is often accompanied by a chaser called sangrita. The whole process of salt and lime bookending a shot is a way for the youngsters to get used to the burn. These training wheels are for the boys learning to be men at a quinceañera, so you, USC frat boy, be a man and lose the fruit! Tequila is also used for a number of cocktails besides margaritas, like tequila sunrise and adios mother fuckers. Give ‘em a try!

So in conclusion let me leave you with a few thoughts. Spend more than $15 on a bottle of tequila and more than $3 for a shot. You’ll thank me in the morning. You don’t always have to take a shot of tequila. Get a good one and you can savor the smoky aroma and hint of vanilla in something like Don Julio 1942. Remember, if it’s got a worm it’s not tequila. And finally, leave the fruit on the side, gentlemen. Enjoy the tequila for what it is or don’t enjoy it at all.
Salud!